Why do boys have nipples?
How come heavy people float but tiny rocks sink?
Is there a difference between cookies and cake?
Can we eat cake for breakfast?
Each new question throbbed at my temples as I repeated in my head: Questions mean they’re engaged. Curiosity is good. Education is important. Don’t burn the eggs!
It is logical to assume that positive parent involvement leads to academic success in children, but that doesn’t necessarily mean parents have to accept the burden of providing kids with all the answers. This distinction — between supporting and enabling — is only just now being discussed among experts in psychology and education.
“Parents don’t need to know all the answers to kids’ questions. In fact, when we enable kids to follow their curiosities and interests, they learn much more,” says Diane Tavenner, author of “Prepared: What Kids Need for a Fulfilled Life.” “As they learn more, they get better at learning and this becomes a virtuous cycle.
“As parents, our role is to take their questions about the world seriously and get curious with our kids,” Tavenner adds. “By modeling the process of independent learning — whether that’s going to the library or searching online — we demonstrate how to discover information and ideas that may spark a lifelong passion.”
But this idea of educating by withholding certain information is counterintuitive for a lot of parents. Even as my eggs blackened in the pan and my pajama pants sagged to the floor along with my crying preschooler, I felt certain that not answering every question would somehow damage my kids’ developing sense of wonder and intellect.